The Position of Love©

Hello Sensuous Women!!!!

I hope that you have been having as much fun as I have since my last blog entry and not sitting around waiting for your husband to make the first move. If you want a marriage that is hot and passionate, you must make it so. As a wife, it is your responsibility to stay exciting and challenging to your husband. It is you who set the bar for the love and happiness that you experience in your life and marriage. If you want a good marriage, then you must sow it.

In addition, you cannot keep rejecting and hurting your husband’s heart and feelings and expect for him to find you an irresistible Sensuous Woman. I have yet to meet a husband who loves being rejected by his wife. He is hurt by it, just like you. He wants to be accepted for who he is, just like you. If you are hard and judgmental toward your husband, lighten up. Do not make him feel inadequate. I am certain that he is doing the best that he can. To bring your husband closer to you, let him know how much you appreciate him and how grateful you are for him sharing his love with you. Kind, gentle and loving words go a long way in creating and building trust and intimacy.

We are now bonafide, tried and true empty nesters. We have paid the parental and financial dues as we have struggled to give our sons a valuable life and education. Gary and I have taken our youngest son Malcolm to college and have left him in God’s hands. We give him back to God as he seeks to make his own way into the world and find his happiness. As a mother, it is time for me to step back from motherhood and make the transition into being his friend. I am cutting the umbilical cord and allowing him the freedom to spread his wings and use the resources and talents that God has equipped him with. I am confident that The Spirit that lives within me lives within him. I trust that God will lead and direct his path as he did mine and with that confidence, I can let him go. As Malcolm seeks to cultivate his faith, trust and belief in himself and God, I can now step aside and let God work. I have much to learn from Malcolm for he is a deep thinker and a spiritual young man. I cannot wait to hear about his experiences and how he is using his faith to create the life of his dreams. I am truly thankful for God using me to give him life. Having the opportunity to experience myself as a mother has stretched my faith and love in many ways. It has been both challenging and rewarding. I will be eternally grateful to God for the experience.

Now that I am all partied out, it is now time to get back to business. As Gary and I move into our next level of love creation, I am excited and happy about the possibilities and the opportunity to make Genesis 2:24 a reality. I feel like a new bride that is young, vibrant and beautiful with the wisdom of a forty-six (46) year old woman. With 20/20 vision, I can look back at those things in my life and marriage that I know do not work and create something different, more beautiful and magnificent than before.

To create a marriage that is satisfying and fulfilling in all areas, the husband and wife must jointly decide to change their attitude and behavior toward each other and how they want to see their marriage unfolding and their experience in it. In marriage, a husband and wife reap what they sow. If you sow a heart and spirit that is mean and angry, your heart and spirit will bear fruit that is mean and angry and this will be the experience that you bring to your life and marriage. Planting fruit of this nature brings about the feelings of resentment and unhappiness. It is both divisive and non-productive and has the elements of marital failure. Sowing and reaping is a biblical principle that I live by. Simply put, what you plant in your heart, mind, body and spirit grows. You get what you give.

An angry and mean spirit will not bring a husband and wife together, it pushes them apart and creates distance between them. It creates conflict and the withdrawal of love. This kind of interaction creates a home environment that is hostile, distrustful and void of love. Foundationally it is weak. It has no substance. In marriages in which anger resides, the husband and wife are just going through the motions and operate with a heart that is guarded and closed. On the surface, the husband and wife appear to be happy. However, their love lacks the honesty, integrity, authenticity, intimacy and the physical-spiritual connection needed for the husband and wife to move forward in their ONEness.

In this kind of marriage, there is the fear of being vulnerable, getting hurt and being judged by your lover and helpmate. The husband and wife feel trapped, unaccepted and unloved and undesired. It leaves a garden that produces and creates weeds.

Weeds are the things that keep you from having a loving demeanor toward yourself, God and your husband. They are the things that can choke the life out of you.

Weeds do damage to your heart, mind, body, spirit, love and marriage. Weeds are the anger, disappointments, regrets, resentments, jealousy, envy, doubts, fears and the feelings of inadequacy, shame and guilt that we (husbands and wives) carry around regarding the choices that we made in our life and our marriage. Weeds keep you stuck in the past or hostage to your sadness. Weeds separate you from your goodness and the experience of God, who is the essence of love. They block your blessings and kill your spirit.

Weeds are the pain of the past of which we are afraid to let go. They are the feelings that we return to when we want to blame or judge ourselves and/or someone else for where we are in our life. They are the cause of our suffering and heart-ache and the lack of joy that we sometimes experience as a husband and wife. Weeds can create a life and marriage that is filled with pain and grief and one that lacks the feeling of happiness and gratitude. Weeds are the product of the lies and secrets that the husband and wife keep from each other. With weeds, the love in marriage cannot bloom effectively. The love between the husband and wife has the potential of withering and dying.

As a husband and wife who have in the past cultivated and nurtured weeds in our marriage, we know for sure that in order to reap something different we have to sow something different. In reciting and intentionally living out our affirmation in the Love Creation© blog, Gary and I have with purpose created a life and marriage that reaps the spiritual fruit of love, trust, forgiveness, compassion, kindness, generosity, mutual respect, acceptance, empathy and gratitude to each other and God. This has helped us to build a life and marriage that is authentic and one that reaps the fruit of honesty and integrity. It is one in which we are both free to expand and experience life in our own way individually and collectively. It is one where we can be ourselves without judgment. No blame and no shame. We accept and respect each other for how we were created by God and that’s it. No need to change each other.

The picture that you are looking at is Gary and me in the YAB YUM position. This is the "Position of Love" that we use to pray, meditate and build our love energy. This is where the husband and wife are connected in their ONEness. It is the one in which we affirm our love for each other and the Power of God. This is how we start and end our day.

This week as you seek to put love into your marriage garden and build intimacy with your lover and helpmate, I want to encourage you to take some time to sit in the YAB YUM. This is a non-sexual position and refraining from sexual intercourse is recommended unless you can’t help yourself and feel the need to go all the way. However, to get the most benefit from this position, I suggest that hold your lover and helpmate and just be connected with no hanky, panky. You are learning how to exchange your love juice and energy in a different way.

The YAB YUM helps to build the heart-soul connection that is needed in marriage. If used on a daily basis, it has the potential of eliminating the barriers that keep the husband and wife feeling separate. It builds the trust and communication skills that are needed to create love. Use this time to pray for and lift each other up. The YAB YUM has become our armor as we send each other out into world covered and surrounded in love.

To perform the YAB YUM, your husband sits cross leg while you sit in his lap and wrap your legs around his waist. In yoga, we refer to this position as the “Lotus Position.” It is how we learned to sit on the floor in kindergarten, legs crossed, back straight with our hands on our knees. However, in this case, you and your husband are hugging and holding each other. If you need pillows to balance each other’s backs, then by all means do so. Also, if sitting on your husband lap feels uncomfortable for either of you, find something else that works. You may find this position a lot easier to perform if you are sitting in a chair. Remember not to get discouraged when trying this position. The intent is to open up your heart, mind, body and spirit and be on ONE accord as you seek to bless, love each other up and acknowledge the presence of God in your union.

Like all Tantric related yoga poses, it is important that you and your husband maintain eye contact and breathe in harmony. Breathing in harmony will help you circulate the love that you are creating as well as build up your stamina. Bless each other with words of kindness. In your recitation, make sure to put your hand on each other’s heart and focus on the love and joy that dwells within your marriage. If you have children, bless them in your love. Give thanks to God for bringing you together and making you ONE body, ONE heart, ONE mind and ONE spirit. Kiss and hold each other for five (5) minutes. Depart knowing that you are leaving each other loved up and connected.

Stay tune for information on our upcoming “The Spiritual Power of Prayer and Meditation©” seminar series. This will be a powerful series that will help the husband and wife discuss and bring clarity to the financial aspect of their love.

Thanks again for all of your wonderful accolades. However, you deserve the praise since you have been doing the work. Keep it up. Your marriage and love will reap great benefits as you apply the love strategies that I have shared freely with you. I am just thankful that I have the opportunity to share with you those things that is keeping my marriage to Gary fun and exciting. It takes two (2) to tangle. A successful marriage requires the gifts and talents from both the husband and wife. You are both contributors. You are both responsible for the fruit that you plant and the taste of it.

This week sow words of love to your husband. Open up your heart to him. Bless him. Keep him encouraged. Make an attempt to connect with him. He needs your covering.

Take care and may God bless you as you co-create the life and marriage of your dreams!

Sensuous Sexy Greta™



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